99th moon [Another Brick in the 4th Wall]

[paladinlost]

[Every day, many wasteful acts are committed across the world: nearly empty shampoo bottles are thrown away, ice cream bowls are not carefully scraped clean with a spoon, quality cold cuts are not placed between slices of freshly-baked bread, regained magic is not cast...

Cecil Harvey is not a wasteful person.

In fact, he's such an unwasteful person that he spends a large part of the weekend teleporting up to random confused souls, offering them ice cream and sandwiches aplenty, and teleporting away.

All of that with hair that looks like it came out of a shampoo commercial, of course.]

Comments

[angerpoints]

--oh, hey! Thanks!

[SAYS YUSUKE, WHO REGARDS THE SANDWICH WITH SURPRISE FOR ALL OF A SECOND BEFORE ACCEPTING IT WITH A BIG GRIN. He's been spending the better half of the day running around enjoying the feeling of being at full strength again, and had just plunked himself down on a curb in the middle of some city he didn't recognize to take a breather when Cecil approached him. He doesn't even question the sudden appearance of Cecil and his sandwiches. When weird shit happens, don't think about it too hard. That is a lesson Yusuke learned long before he showed up in Johto.]

[paladinlost]

You're welcome! Everyone'll be busy and confused for the whole weekend, but this madness is no reason to forget to eat properly.

[Cecil's been through this ten times. He's got the 'surviving random teleportations and Magikarps' thing down to an art form.]

[angerpoints]

[Yusuke hums his agreement around a mouthful of sandwich. Damn, this is good stuff. Why can't delicious sandwiches always be a thing when the world shits the bed and crazy bullshit starts happening?]

So, uh - [He swallows.] Is this always how you spend weekends like this?

[BECAUSE IF IT IS, THEN BUDDY, HE IS GONNA MAKE A DELIBERATE EFFORT TO TRACK YOU DOWN NEXT TIME.]

[paladinlost]

Whenever I do not find myself lost within caves or department stores, yes.

[Which is about half the time, so.

Cecil starts eating a sandwich of his own. All that teleporting has left him hungry.]

Sometimes I also find the time to grill meat in my backyard, but Flare ate the last of my beef yesterday.

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain glances around, spear in hand and looking confused (and very obviously prepared to defend himself from potential enemies, as always)... when SUDDENLY CECIL. Well, perhaps this ought to clear up things as to why he's here and not back in any familiar surroundings. He lowers the weapon.]

Cecil.

...Why does this feel familiar?

[paladinlost]

[Cecil seems completely unsurprised by Kain's sudden presence and weaponry. Quite possibly because he is completely unsurprised.]

Because even this world has its constants, to everyone's relief. Would you like some chocolate sauce with your ice cream?

[Note that he's not asking if Kain wants ice cream.]

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain stares at him, a bit incredulous and wondering if he's in the midst of a dream. It certainly feels dream-like...]

Are you seriously asking me that?

[paladinlost]

[For one moment, the smile falls and Cecil looks almost tired.]

Kain, I've been through this madness ten times. Keeping food on hand for unexpected guests was the next natural step.

[But the moment passes quickly, and Cecil beams again.]

I also have caramel, if that's what you'd prefer.

[dragoon_pride]

[Well, that explains the bizarre sense of deja vu that's plaguing him at the moment. Perhaps he should let go of the scowl and attempt to have... fun... no, but at least the scowl can leave.]

The chocolate would be fine. But Cecil... why has this happened? And why so often?

[paladinlost]

Two excellent questions, to which the only answer I can offer is 'I don't know'.

[He starts pouring the sauce on the ice cream. Mmmmm.]

It might be related to the arrival of the first trainers here. That took place exactly five years ago, and the first of these events happened six months later. Strawberries?

[dragoon_pride]

[It does look delicious... No, what is he thinking, he must not allow himself be become overly distracted by ice cream.]

And what brought the trainers here? There surely must be some explanation for it all, right?

[He sighs, as if resigning himself to madness. Being transported around to random worlds ought to be something he's used to by now.]

...Fine, very well, yes.

[paladinlost]

[And now, thanks to the strawberries, the ice cream has become even more alluring.]

There must be, but it's not been shared with us. Though one of the local Legendaries, the closest this world has to gods, did personally request our help and protect us some time ago.

[dragoon_pride]

[That it has, and he eyes it closely, looking very much tempted by it now.]

Ah, so what happened? Were you enlisted to fight some battle for them in the way we did for Cosmos?

[paladinlost]

[Luckily for Kain it's all his, freely offered for his consumption!]

I was enlisted to stop two criminal groups from destroying each other, with this world as collateral damage.

[dragoon_pride]

[Siiiigh he has no choice at all does he? Besides, he doesn't want it to melt. So he gives in to dig in to the ice cream.]

A difficult position to find yourself in, truly. What happened?

[paladinlost]

Both groups were hoping to take over the world through the use of large crystals and enslaved legendaries. We fought against them to stop those plans, but the power they unleashed went out of control. Had that llama not been there, this world would surely have been damaged beyond repair.

[Somehow, that last sentence comes out completely seriously.]

[dragoon_pride]

[Kain raises an eyebrow, setting down his spoon a brief moment.]

Llama? What sort of powers did it possess?

[paladinlost]

I'd say the power to shield us all from a potentially world-destroying explosion was the most important, but it also repaired the damage to the battlefield.

[dragoon_pride]

What manner of creature is this, to have such power? Surely it was enchanted somehow?

[paladinlost]

It's a legendary. Such impressive powers are to be expected, if even half the legends are true.

[dragoon_pride]

Are legendaries as powerful as the gods then?

[paladinlost]

As far as this world is concerned, they are gods.

[dragoon_pride]

Truly? Do they also have you going to war for them like some others that we know?

[paladinlost]

Not at all. They are content with letting us travel and own businesses as we wish.

[dragoon_pride]

That's it? No further tasks beyond that? How strange...