paladinlost | 30th moon [video]

[Today's view of Ecruteak's Pokémon Center appears perfectly normal: the usual music is playing, the receptionist's desk is clean, and Cecil is smiling, with his hands clasped together and his right eyebrow twitching and- erm.]

Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. This is a Public Service Announcement.

[A strange squelching noise can be heard from behind him, apparently moving. He ignores it.]

A Tentacruel answering to 'Lester' was found in the Ecruteak City Pokémon Center's women's bathroom this morning, unharmed and bearing a copy of '649 Ways to Bond With Your Tentacruel', along with two pairs of female undergarments. If you have any information about Lester's owner, please contact the Ecruteak City Pokémon Center promptly. Your cooperation would be greatly appreciated.

[A tentacle slowly slides up his left arm, finally resting on his shoulder. He ignores it.]

In addition, the Ecruteak City Pokémon Center would like to apologize for the disturbance, and assures all of its clients that such incidents will not take place again in the future. Thank you for your time.

[Cecil's smile looks particularly frozen as he turns the feed off.]

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We've heard nothing from them, as of now.

[Cheerful enough to wave, mister!]

Hopefully your luck will improve soon?

[Waving back. Uh, hi?]

I'll ask every single person in Ecruteak personally if I have to.

That's a pretty dedicated statement. I'm going to wish you luck on finding his owner--- hopefully sooner than later.

Thank you. If we are lucky, this'll be over by the end of the day.

How do you think he ended up there in the first place though?

He might have escaped, or he might have been brought here deliberately.

Escaped from what though? [A pause.] Considering he looks... harmless... enough, I guess it's a little weird to just leave him there too.

His loving home?

[He hopes it'S loving.]

It could have been an ill-thought ploy to attract women.

... If it's the latter, it's really ill-thought. 649 Ways to Bond with your Tentacruel? Really?

I honestly doubt there are that many. And who would buy that sort of book?

Someone who either really wants to er... bond with their Tentacruel, or someone who is wondering just how you can do that exactly.

... I hope the underwear isn't involved in that book.

...I will not see for myself, but if someone tells me it is, I will burn that book immediately.

[...

...

P-pffft. Going to try muffling his laughter here.]

I'm serious. What if a child had been the one to find him?

Luckily it's you, right? Not a child.

A nurse trainee, actually. So young, still so innocent...

[...] Did... it do anything to her?

No, but she saw the pictures within the book and started screaming.

... Should... Shouldn't that already be an indication of why you should burn that book?

It still belongs to someone. I cannot get rid of it just yet.

I suppose so. Though, I wonder just how many copies of that book exists out there.

We'd have to ask the publisher to know, but I'm slightly afraid of speaking to someone willing to publish this.

Maybe it was self-published? You never know.

That would take much money and connections. A Gym leader, perhaps?

[video]

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