paladinlost | 90th moon [video]

Everyone, look at the wonderful meal my team prepared for me! Is it not by far the tastiest-looking meal you've ever seen?

[Wow, Cecil sure sounds enthusiastic about his meal today. Overly enthusiastic, even, to the point that most of it seems faked. Just like a father loudly praising his child's particularly ugly macaroni artwork to the skies when witnesses are present.

Which is a surprisingly appropriate comparison, as the "meal" he now shows to the world only looks the part when compared to tar-coated cement. The chicken seems raw, the barbecue sauce has fuzzy grey and green bits, the pasta could be recognized as overcooked twenty paces away, the potatoes would easily replace the aforementioned cement...]

Why, it looks so wonderful, I cannot bear to ruin it with a bite! Perhaps I should freeze it, and keep it intact on a shelf as a testament to their talent-

[Multiples annoyed grumblings can heard, and a blue tentacle moves into the frame, holding a fork and waving it angrily. No, trainer, we prepared this so you could show the world our boundless talent and enjoy our efforts. You've done the first, now do the second. Or else.]

...If you all insist.

[The Pokégear is set down on the table and promptly picked up by one of the Pokémon present, allowing Cecil to appear on the screen, fork in hand. He hesitates for a few seconds, picks a piece of chicken up, brings it to his mouth, takes a wary bite...

His eyes quickly widen, and the Gear is promptly turned off just as a Lilligant calls out in alarm.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only | Expand All

The thought of remembering this taste after my bones turn to dust and my tongue decomposes. Surely no one deserves that.

No one ever does. But on the other hand, I'm not the guy who decided on the rules.

Replacing the taste with another must be possible, somehow. Even if I have to burn my tastebuds with spices.

Or chilli! Maybe a mix of spices and chilli would help. [Ideally a delicious mix of it.]

I should look into local chili restaurants, then. Ideally before my team decides to prepare it themselves.

Good luck with that. Or they want to make you dessert to go with that meal.

...Please stop speaking such terrifying ideas out loud. I mean it.

Aww, but they love you!

[A pause.]

They didn't hear my idea, right?

...I'm not certain. But if they did, I might be tempted to share the fruits of their efforts.

Whoever you might be sharing it with might probably feel a little honoured.

They'd feel the pain of a thousand deaths, too.

Things trainers must endure out of love for their Pokemon. Or their friends' Pokemon.

I never imagined that one could sacrifice too much for love, before.

They do say love can be a very powerful motivation. [That or loyalty.]

But not powerful enough to accept food poisoning, I'd like to hope.

Hopefully, but do you want to disappoint anyone who worked hard to make food for you?

Is it not best for them to learn that all lives have their share of disappointments? Preferably before someone truly falls ill?

It is better for them to learn... But watching their failure would make the lesson stick more. Hearing about it isn't as strong as seeing it in action.

If one follows that line of thought to its logical conclusion, they might as well fall ill from their cooking themselves.

Maybe not that far, since no one wants to get sick. But they should at least taste test their food before giving them to people.

[Pfft, people taste testing things.]

...Which is exactly what I said. A single taste would suffice to make any Pokémon feel nauseated.

Right.

...Unless their tastebuds are slightly different?

...That would explain much about my Arcanine, but the others have a relatively normal sense of taste.

Then I got nothing for the rest of them.

Oh, I have no doubt they'd still taste their results once to try and prove my reaction wrong.

[Video]

babel_hacker - 2014-06-21 03:45 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-06-21 20:40 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-06-25 03:08 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-06-25 14:51 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-06-27 23:00 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-06-28 21:34 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-02 11:33 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-03 01:11 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-03 12:25 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-04 16:21 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-05 07:49 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-05 18:37 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-09 02:09 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-10 00:05 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-11 13:00 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-12 19:55 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-16 02:36 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-16 16:26 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-19 00:48 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-19 03:16 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-23 05:33 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-23 12:01 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-07-30 08:21 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-07-30 22:37 (UTC) - Expand

babel_hacker - 2014-08-03 09:29 (UTC) - Expand

paladinlost - 2014-08-03 13:57 (UTC) - Expand