paladinlost | 93rd moon [video]

[The view: the ceiling of the most enpensive restaurant in Celadon. The background noise: dozens of customers enjoying their meals, and Cecil tapping his fingers on a wooden table.]

When I first awoke in New Bark Town, four years ago, I was... unwell. This whole world's very existence confused me, and so did my presence in it. The relatively weak and harmless-looking monsters were also a shock. Had it not been for Rosie's sweetness, I surely would have attempted to fight her. You could say that day was very unpleasant, though still far from the worse I've had.

[The background noise: a liquid hitting glass. The view: a quick flash of a wine bottle in a corner.]

And yet... when I finally managed to use the Pokégear, I was contacted by friends I'd not seen in seventeen years. Friends I'd not remembered in seventeen years, and that I would not have expected to ever see again even if I'd kept those memories. I also met kind people, good people, who made my first few weeks here much easier than they would otherwise have been. All have been gone for years, now, but I still find myself thinking of them fondly. Therefore... you could say that day was a good day, too.

[The action, unseen and barely heard: Cecil making a silent toast to all those people, and downing that glass before setting it back on the table.]

...Well! Now that I've shared my first day experience, it's only fitting that you do the same. Surely you all have interesting stories to share.

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[...that is a very pretty serpent you have there, goodness.]

That seems to be what most people here want - to go home eventually, I mean! I wouldn't, personally, but our situation is a bit different from most; at the same time, I still find myself missing familiar things and people like my family and what have you, so I can understand the feeling even if I don't really share it.

[Empathy, honey. You just described...oh, never mind.]

I remember the weather being pleasant that day, though, yes! I don't know if it actually was or if I just wanted it to be, but I remember the skies being clear. Someone was standing next to me for a while trying to work out what I was looking at, and I don't think she would have been doing that if there was actually something to see.

It all depends on what you could go back to, certainly. I've known people who had lost everything in their worlds, and could enjoy the presence of dead loved ones as long as they lived here. For those people's sake, I wish there was a way to ensure we could stay in this land forever, even if I'd much rather go home to my family.

[He won't say that most of those people have since disappeared, because that is extremely depressing and he's hoping for another happy anniversary this year.]

That's quite lucky. I've not noticed a difference between the stays of those who arrive during winter storms and those who arrive on warm summer days, but I still like to think of it as a blessing.

So do I.

...Most people seem to think that in order to have one, we'll have to sacrifice the other - that is, if we find a way to ensure we can stay, we'll have to stay for whatever reason. I don't see why it can't be a choice, though, if we can find a way to do it.

How likely do you think it is, that we'll find something like that?

...With every year that passes, it feels as though the likelihood of us finding a convenient way to control our comings and goings shrinks. We can only search for leads in two regions, and this world is much larger than any of us first believed... However, I do believe that it exists somewhere, and that if we found it we could indeed choose to leave or return to this world at will. The trickest part might be retaining our memories once we return home, but I've no doubt we could find a solution.

[They're definitely motivated enough to find one, no matter how long it takes.]

...I believe that, too. I've spoken to a few people that seem to think they know how it can be done, but I don't think they have anything besides theories - but it's something that we should hold out hope for, regardless of how hopeless it seems now!

If we were to give up on searching, on hoping, it would make the hopes and hard work of those that have long left us worthless. But our best early leads were proven false, and most theories I know depend on magic that is taken from us upon arrival. I have to admit that the lack of new possibilities is disheartening.

That's the sort of thing one of my friends tends to say a lot, too, regarding the reasons why we shouldn't give up - I think it's something that a lot of people could learn from, as it's gotten us through a lot.

I'm glad to hear it from someone else, too.

I've long learned that in certain situations, my only choices were to keep fighting and hoping or to give up and die. Luckily, the consequences here would be much less dire, though still unhappy. Is that friend of yours one of the people you were reunited with on your first day?

He is, yes! We didn't meet in person here, though; he was several cities away by the time I arrived, since he got here before I did.

Ah, that can be troublesome. Had he arrived early enough to have acquired a Pokémon large enough to ride or a flyer by then, or did you both have to walk?