45th moon [video]

[paladinlost]

[A pale hand is slowly rolling a few Pokéballs on a desk, as its owner speaks softly.]

One received as a starter, oh so long ago.

[Sweet little Rosie, who had taught him the basics of this world when he was not in a state to learn by himself.]

Two caught with my own hands, within my first month here.

[To have revenge and to keep the peace, and perhaps out of curiosity and wonder.]

One received as a gift, to remind each other of our fondness.

[But Aerith was gone, now, and he'd never found out where her Marill went.]

Eight eggs, bought and traded and raised from birth.

[All of them grown, now, with nearly nothing left to learn from him.]

...Nine who found me when their trainers were lost, and who might have seen them come and go since then.

[Yet so many of his friends had disappeared leaving none behind, with nothing but his memories left of them.

The hand stills over one of the balls. His message is almost over.]

...Perhaps I should start catching once more, and start anew somewhere else.

Comments

[Video]

[foolishwren]

...

_{[Normally she's not honestly pinged by philosophical musings... but she's lost a lot of her friends lately, and it's been weighing on her more than she likes to show.]}

... Have you lost a lot of people?

[Video]

[paladinlost]

...I did. People from home, people I knew in another world, people I've met here... I'm starting to tire of it, to be frank.

[Video]

[foolishwren]

Yeah... I think we're all starting to tire of it.

[Video]

[paladinlost]

You'd think whoever is responsible would have received the message by now.

[Video]

[foolishwren]

I'm pretty sure whoever's responsible doesn't care.

_{[Or, as she was beginning to suspect... liked watching people run themselves in emotional circles as the world arbitrarily rewarded or punished them with the presence or nonpresence of their friends and enemies. It's starting to get... tiring, and Heather's sure she's not the only one that feels that way.]}

[Video]

[soggypastry]

Starting over doesn't make it any easier, Cecil. It doesn't stop the pain.

[Said with experience coloring her tone; Cecil isn't the only one to have lost friends and family to this place.]

[Video]

[paladinlost]

...What about seeking a new goal, and finding a new land to wonder at?

[The east, it calls to him. Strongly and deeply.]

[Video]

[soggypastry]

It still wouldn't make it easier. You can't run from your past or your memories. They'll catch up to you eventually.

[It can call all it wants, but that won't change what he's come from. It never does.]

[Video]

[paladinlost]

Running in itself is not necessary. All I need is something to soften them, to enhance their sweetness and lessen their bitterness. I've merely not been able to find it in Goldenrod, or in Johto's other cities.

[Being unable to act after a loss is not being good for him at all.]

[VIDEO] - I am so sorry, he is a jerk.

[sadisticwarfare.livejournal.com]

[For that you can have some slow clapping!]

Congratulations. I'm sure you'll get all the sympathy you're expecting from a video like this.

[This is Archer. He's an insensitive jackass who can't stand those who lament over their own situations without doing anything about it. This is clearly what you're doing, right? Well, even if it isn't, he's just going to bitch at you anyway!]

If I'm correct, you're talking about others who were in this world who disappeared. Have you considered that they might have gone home? Have you looked at it from their point of view? Perhaps they prefer their home over whatever abomination this place is. Stop sulking; there are those of us who don't want to hear it.

[VIDEO] - He's dealt with worse than that.

[paladinlost]

It is... not quite sympathy that I seek, but perhaps companionship. Others who have felt the need to move, to see what this world has to offer and how we can make use of it.

[A pause.]

One returned home as a captive; another as a broken man; a third, as one perhaps about to die. They knew that; could those states truly bring them happiness? It will be for the best, in the end, but a part of me still selfishly wishes they could have been happy here for some more time.

[VIDEO]

[sadisticwarfare.livejournal.com]

You would so easily replace those you have lost? Finding new "companions" will not replace those who have left.

Perhaps they are destined to see misfortune in their own worlds. That doesn't change the fact that they belong there. You claim to want them only to be happy here, but what if they weren't happy here in the first place?

[VIDEO]

[paladinlost]

You speak as though there was a quota on comrades and friends; I can easily meet new ones without replacing anyone. They were happy here, and I was happy to see them. But I am also happy when I see others who are still here.

[Video.]

[hasearthbooks.livejournal.com]

[A man with blond dreadlocks and blue eyes in a white labcoat occupies most of the screen. In the bottom right corner there's a tiny Ralts tearing up, its lips quivering. The man himself shows decidedly less emotions, but, if Ralts' mood is any indication, it doesn't necessarily mean that he isn't feeling them. As a matter of fact, there's an almost imperceptible wet glisten in Gorthan's eyes as well.]

... I'm sorry.

If you think it would help ease the pain of your heart... I would very much like to hear more about those you have lost.

[Video.]

[paladinlost]

...I'm not certain it would ease it; I'm not certain there is anything left to ease, truly.

[Even this month's losses have mostly faded away, excepting nightly periods of introspection.]

But it'd certainly take a day and a night to speak of them all.

[Video.]

[hasearthbooks.livejournal.com]

I am always willing to listen to somebody who has stories to tell. Assuming they wish to tell them, of course.

[Video.]

[paladinlost]

...Tell me, then. When did you first arrive? I'd prefer to tell you about people you could not have met.

voice;

[harbringersoul.livejournal.com]

...you've been here for some time.

voice;

[paladinlost]

A year and two months, almost. I'm not quite one of the earliest arrivals, but few of them remain.

voice;

[harbringersoul.livejournal.com]

How long has this been happening?

voice;

[paladinlost]

The first mentions of anniversaries on the network took place around the end of May. I doubt many arrived before that time.

[video]

[biteisbigger.livejournal.com]

[ she's really not sure what to say, so have a niece-thing trying to look supportive. ]

[video]

[paladinlost]

[Her attempts at support are met by attempts at reassurance.]

Would it not be nice? To have new lands to visit, and new people and Pokémon to meet?

[video]

[biteisbigger.livejournal.com]

It sounds a little scary...

[video]

[paladinlost]

...Perhaps it is. but I enjoy it. My own world has no place left to show me.